Nothing in the world seems to help. I spent forever trying to find something to watch, but literally nothing felt good. Even when I eventually put something on it felt empty and I just ended up staring at the wall. I tried playing videos games, some of which I really love, and I turned them all off after a few minutes. I’ve tried other things too. Half the time I don’t even eat. Time passes in slow motion, like some kind of purgatory. The worst is I can’t even sleep. I have the next few days off and they’re going to feel like an eternity. It actually scares me. How do you get through this? I’m desperate.
For what it’s worth, I see a therapist weekly and I’m on a few different medications. This particular bout of sadness is caused by an especially painful rejection.
Cry. We get trained early to hold it in. Whether it’s a good intentioned “please don’t cry” or a heartless “stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about”, we learn when we’re young that it’s not okay to let out our emotions. But sadness passes in tears. My wife of 25 years died less than two months ago. I have good support from people who understand letting out your emotions and I’ve been crying hard almost every day since then. I’m mostly past the acute grief now. I’m getting out and doing things with people, spending time with friends. I still have moments where I see something of hers and have to take a moment to cry. But I’m up and living my life.
So be gentle with yourself. Hold space for your sadness and let the tears come. It’s the only way I know of to pass through it.