Nothing in the world seems to help. I spent forever trying to find something to watch, but literally nothing felt good. Even when I eventually put something on it felt empty and I just ended up staring at the wall. I tried playing videos games, some of which I really love, and I turned them all off after a few minutes. I’ve tried other things too. Half the time I don’t even eat. Time passes in slow motion, like some kind of purgatory. The worst is I can’t even sleep. I have the next few days off and they’re going to feel like an eternity. It actually scares me. How do you get through this? I’m desperate.
For what it’s worth, I see a therapist weekly and I’m on a few different medications. This particular bout of sadness is caused by an especially painful rejection.
He was pretty standard in like mother trauma and get your feelings and needs out. Nothing that I required help with per se, but still he helped me in my path.
A new one though is nowhere to be seen. I have pretty much given up getting a ‘professional’ diagnosis and a therapist that is able to cope with high functioning high masking adult autists. And that’s in a so called first world country.
But now I know who I am and what I need.