I’ll be doing a T-shirt printing soon to celebrate our upcoming victory (which the bottlenose dolphins I have established long-distance telepathic communication with (it must be long distance, for I live in a landlocked state) assure me is nigh) over the forces of reaction and I don’t know which to have printed on the new government uniform: USSA (United Soviet States of America) or USSotFUSA (United Soviet States of the Former United States of America).

I am also considering, due to the significant trauma everyone’s got around the names “America” and “USA”, doing away with it altogether and just calling our new country “HexBearLand” or “Cuddlefish’s Country of Communal Proletarianism”, if the councils will agree to make me the tip of the spear.

I considered holding an election to determine the name, but I do not relish the prospect of having to be a proud citizen of CountryMcCountryFace.