MJ calls what happened to her in Zion national park “small ‘T’ trauma”. She knows women have experienced worse from their partners. But she still feels the anger of being left behind on a hike by her now ex. “It brings up stuff in my body that maybe I have not cleared out yet,” she said.

Five years ago, MJ and a new partner – he was not exactly her boyfriend, and the pair were not exclusive – traveled from Los Angeles to Utah for an adventure getaway. MJ, who is 38 and works in PR, was looking forward to exploring Zion’s striking scenery; its vast sandstone canyon and pristine wading trails were on the list. But on the morning of their big hike, MJ was not feeling well. She could not shake the feeling that something was “off”; indeed, MJ would learn on this trip that her partner was seeing other women.

As they made their way up Angel’s Landing, MJ’s partner started walking faster than her. “I could tell it was getting on his nerves that I was slow,” she said. “I was like, ‘Fuck it, just go ahead of me.’” He did without hesitation.

When she caught up at the top of the mountain, they took a picture together. Then her partner hiked down the mountain with a woman he had met on the way up, leaving MJ to finish by herself. They broke up shortly after that trip. (MJ asked to be referred to by her initials for the sake of speaking openly about a past relationship.)

Last month, MJ opened TikTok and heard the phrase “alpine divorce”, a label she now attaches to her experience in Zion.

  • SaraTonin@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    the pair were not exclusive

    MJ would learn on this trip that her partner was seeing other women

    …isn’t that was “not exclusive” means?

    • stoly@lemmy.world
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      22 hours ago

      You don’t expect your BF to hook up with someone new mid-mountain.

          • flying_sheep@lemmy.ml
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            12 hours ago

            Nobody but you said that that part is OK.

            You’re in a thread wondering about thee thread’s confusing description of their relationship status, not about the “leaving her behind” part.

            • stoly@lemmy.world
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              5 hours ago

              Nobody but you missed the sarcasm. Or the moral behind it.

          • Lumisal@lemmy.world
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            12 hours ago

            I was talking about the hooking up mid mountain part, which is what your comment I replied to was primarily about. And the OPs too.

            You can just admit you missed that part instead of getting defensive.

            • stoly@lemmy.world
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              5 hours ago

              I missed nothing. That is not important to the story. When you go into the wilderness with someone, you have formed an inherent defense pact and have a duty of care to each other. Hooking up mid mountain and leaving the other person, regardless of their relationship, is immoral. If harm comes to them, then it was likely illegal.

              • Lumisal@lemmy.world
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                2 hours ago

                Your comment wasn’t talking about the “abandoning mid mountain” part. It was talking about the relationship status part. That’s the part I corrected. We weren’t, in this comment chain, talking about the overall story - it was about your comment on their relationship. Stop trying to build a strawman.

                Geez, Americans really can’t admit they made even a minor mistake.

                • stoly@lemmy.world
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                  56 minutes ago

                  Adding you to my block list. Keep your petulant pedantry to yourself.

    • podian@piefed.social
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      17 hours ago

      Uhhhh

      “seeing other women” means “not exclusive”

      but “not exclusive” does not always mean “seeing other women”

      He could be, just as one example of many, very unsuccessful at trying to see other women despite having an existing “nonexclusivity” agreement with her.

    • Velma@lemmy.today
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      1 day ago

      Casual partners may still prefer to know if their partner is sleeping with others for a variety of reasons. The first one that comes to mind is health.

      • SaraTonin@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        Sure. My point is, though, isn’t that already implied by them not being exclusive?

        • Velma@lemmy.today
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          1 day ago

          They could be not exclusive but still agree to let the other know when they introduce a new sex partner.

          Y’all never heard of safe sex?

    • TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      yes, but people are emotional and they don’t abide by their own terms

      every casual relationship i ever had was never actually casual. it was just full on monogamy with a ‘get out of jail if someone better comes along’ card built in.