Guys no one ever says “don’t even ASK!”. It’s just that if you do ask, and the person does not have the energy or the capacity of explaining at that moment for any reason, don’t push and don’t get angry. Being oppressed is tiring, and having to explain yourself all the time is even more tiring. That’s all. If you are genuinely curious, you will find resources to learn and even people willing to teach. Just don’t expect EVERYONE to be that person.
Playing devil’s advocate: Shouldn’t those who are not in a marginalized group be somewhat expected to have a modicum of understanding for those around them, though? No one should be expected to explain how, or why, they are who they are, and being pointedly asked about it generally puts a contentious focus on that aspect. Many, many people have put their energy and effort to explain all sorts of aspects about themselves, which are readily available at a moments notice. Why not rely on those instead of bringing up a potentially vulnerable topic and/or using a single aspect of one’s identity as a talking point?
Well yeah that’s what I meant. Learning is necessary, teaching is voluntary.
They lost me at the last point tbh. I don’t blame anyone for not knowing and you shouldn’t blame me for not learning about something that hasn’t affected me.
It’s your responsibility to learn, not their responsibility to teach.
also, found this from a tumblr post
My problem with “it’s not my job to educate you!” is that if you’re an activist then yes, it is your job, that’s part of what activism is. If you call yourself an activist but in the next breath refuse to offer education to those who are able to listen, your activism is performative/disingenuous at best and actively harmful at worst. Telling people to “google it” it not helpful when google has become increasingly unusable and bogged down with advertisements and unusable results - not to mention, not everyone can be expected to tell the difference between accurate sources and, say, dogwhistle-y propaganda messages, especially if they are new to leftism. You could be doing more to push them towards the right than to help them understand leftism, all because of “purity politics” or clique behaviors or superiority complexes or whatever it is that’s causing all these people to behave this way.
Not everyone is an activist though. And even those that are, they need down time sometimes. I get it’s tough for those on the spectrum to understand, but in this context, let people at the table just play the fucking game.
Every time I see stuff like this I instantly think of:

Like, congrats, it’s nice to pat yourself on the back and all but…
I think it enforces itself by being off-putting to bigots. How many of them are playing it “incorrectly” to own the libs rather than just playing something they perceive as less hostile?
Out of couriosity: I have never played the game, so… is the game actually unplayable if you decide to be intolerant against one or more of these? (As in: Is the tolerance and representation part of the core mechanics or is this just meant as a statement?)
Everything from the rules of the game to the GM guide to the pre written game settings are written with the assumption that players and the gm will be respectful and kind, but no you could absolutely try to play the game about connection-seeking queers fighting oppression and finding family as a bigot
Is asking okay though ?
Ask politely, show a genuine interest, and don’t try to undermine what they say. Also read the room if it’s going into a topic that someone doesn’t feel comfortable talking about and be ready to learn another day!
Thanks for the honest answer !




