I’m not going to pretend that I understand everything happening to today’s young daters, but what you’re describing isn’t true in my circles (which skew older and richer, but where the people going on dates are more likely to be divorced and/or have children from prior relationships, but where $200 on a weeknight dinner is not unusual or a financial stretch).

More importantly, I still stand by my description of how the article mangled the underlying studies. Dating can be expensive, but not everyone who goes on a $200 date in that survey is going on a first date with a stranger, and $93 is probably a better metric to follow to understand what is happening.

The rest of my comment is just a description of what I believe will both reduce the amount of money spent on first dates and increase the expected value of that date by deferring any decision to spend any money by only going on dates with people you already kinda know and already like. If you don’t believe that advice is practical for your current circumstances, I’m sorry to hear that, but I wonder if you can find another way to achieve similar effects.