As a straight dom male, I can tell you that the inverse is also true. Straight sub women routinely want me to do stuff that isn’t BDSM and is actual abuse. I blame the 50 shades of grey series at least in part for that.
Straight sub women routinely want me to do stuff that isn’t BDSM and is actual abuse.
Give some examples?
I have very few restrictions when it comes to someone getting physical with me as long as it’s not permanent. I have found plenty of doms lacking because they express discomfort in rougher kinks. Light bruising is not abuse for example although you should probably take your time and get to know me well enough so that you trust I’m not crazy and that I won’t tell people you’re battering me.
One lady wanted me to choke her till she passed out. Another lady wanted a bag over her head. Another asked me to “punch me and leave bruises while I cum.” I could go on, but honestly it’s kinda disturbing.
Then there are the people that confuse CNC with straight up rape. Rape fantasy is one thing. Asking me to organize a CNC “home breakin” with people that you specifically don’t know and have never met isn’t something I would have any idea how to do safely.
Oh dear god do not do the donkey punch, no no no no, noooooo.
I’ve never been asked to, but I knew guys who were, and like… doing the equivalent of that in a competetive martial art would get you heavily penalized, potentially forfeit the match or functionally end your career.
The last one is where I would draw the line, even if it involved vetting people off of fetlife.
There’s a difference between hard doms and soft doms. It sounds more like you’re the second and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. Some of us genuinely enjoy being hit and choked and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. It means we trust you enough to even ask at all. If it’s not something you enjoy or feel comfortable doing that is also fine.
Choking someone until they pass out is absolutely not fine. That’s extremely dangerous and will cause permanent harm. You shouldn’t should never be anywhere NEAR the point of losing consciousness.
I know choking can feel good, but there’s no safe way to do it aside from just putting your hand there and applying zero pressure. You’re literally depriving your brain of oxygen.
This gave me a bit of a giggle because I used to know a real one who would show off their work. Not as a trophy or anything, more like, “This is how bruised I’m willing to make someone.” A display of competence, but also a limit. He had anonymized photos from different sessions, and it gave great insight into what impact play actually looks like.
All pictures were taken and shown from the neck down, with consent.
As a straight dom male, I can tell you that the inverse is also true. Straight sub women routinely want me to do stuff that isn’t BDSM and is actual abuse. I blame the 50 shades of grey series at least in part for that.
For sure. All of my friends in the community HATE 50 Shades of Grey
Give some examples?
I have very few restrictions when it comes to someone getting physical with me as long as it’s not permanent. I have found plenty of doms lacking because they express discomfort in rougher kinks. Light bruising is not abuse for example although you should probably take your time and get to know me well enough so that you trust I’m not crazy and that I won’t tell people you’re battering me.
One lady wanted me to choke her till she passed out. Another lady wanted a bag over her head. Another asked me to “punch me and leave bruises while I cum.” I could go on, but honestly it’s kinda disturbing.
Then there are the people that confuse CNC with straight up rape. Rape fantasy is one thing. Asking me to organize a CNC “home breakin” with people that you specifically don’t know and have never met isn’t something I would have any idea how to do safely.
Oh dear god do not do the donkey punch, no no no no, noooooo.
I’ve never been asked to, but I knew guys who were, and like… doing the equivalent of that in a competetive martial art would get you heavily penalized, potentially forfeit the match or functionally end your career.
Very not safe.
Someone keept telling me about how they wanted me to do CNC stuff, and I pretty much felt nauseous at hearing that shit.
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The first few are fine?
The last one is where I would draw the line, even if it involved vetting people off of fetlife.
There’s a difference between hard doms and soft doms. It sounds more like you’re the second and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. Some of us genuinely enjoy being hit and choked and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. It means we trust you enough to even ask at all. If it’s not something you enjoy or feel comfortable doing that is also fine.
Choking someone until they pass out is absolutely not fine. That’s extremely dangerous and will cause permanent harm. You shouldn’t should never be anywhere NEAR the point of losing consciousness.
I know choking can feel good, but there’s no safe way to do it aside from just putting your hand there and applying zero pressure. You’re literally depriving your brain of oxygen.
I don’t really have much to say besides calling you a coward. Obviously there’s risk involved. That’s part of the point.
The problem is that people underestimate the risk. For many it’s not worth the risk, they just don’t realize it
This gave me a bit of a giggle because I used to know a real one who would show off their work. Not as a trophy or anything, more like, “This is how bruised I’m willing to make someone.” A display of competence, but also a limit. He had anonymized photos from different sessions, and it gave great insight into what impact play actually looks like.
All pictures were taken and shown from the neck down, with consent.
This unfortunately, too real. It’s really unfortunate that it’s gotten bad for both genders,
And I’m a straight dom male, I’m very chill but, a lot of women into things that make me nope out