I’ve never had cable in my entire life. Parents never paid for it, and I got so sick of watching planes crash into buildings 25 years ago that I stopped watching it entirely. It didn’t take long before advertising drove me crazy, and I’ve never been back.

I’ve been arguing with strangers online ever since. I should get back into books.

Doesn’t matter how big your dick is when you’re trying to fuck a hornet nest.

Waaaaaah! But Joe Biden! Obama! Waaaaaaah!!1!

My father told me I shouldn’t use regular table salt because “they” were mixing powdered glass in so that it would work its way through your system and embed itself in your heart muscles.

He had called me after I got high though, so I gave him the best kid glove treatment I’ve ever managed.

Told him that was very interesting. Explained that he could easily prove and expose the conspiracy by pouring salt into a bucket of distilled water. The salt would dissolve, but the glass would sink to the bottom. He could then filter the glass out, then boil the water off to recover the salt safely. He hasn’t brought it up since.

My dad is a sweet guy and good at handyman stuff, but dear lord, almost nothing higher level. I truly think it’s the lead exposure.

I mean, I struggle not to think that about conservatives.

Hasa deega Ebowai

Shadows can move faster than light.

Well, the nice thing is there are lots of people eager and waiting to let us all know when and precisely how, in elaborate detail, we are being dumb fucks ourselves.

Feedback is useful.

No don’t kill him first.

Just once, for GTAV.

They released just after midnight. There was a decent line as I recall, probably less than 50 people. People cracked jokes about the series, and quoted favorite dialogue. The first guy in line strode victoriously to his car, his copy held high, then burned rubber when he hit asphalt. Immediately a cop tore after him out of the darkness. The rest of us went “ooooooo”. Somebody said, “No that’s just one star. He can do this!”

Nope. She is way cooler than almost anyone.

Some of us are just doing all we can to avoid spilling blood.

Humboldt squid in California are even more ethical. Invasive, fecund, voracious, ferocious, short lived.

Let Pele take him.

Dude has never lifted anything heavy in his life. He’s never once taken a punch. He’s soft like 10-ply. I’d be delighted to demonstrate.

Vaccine fear mongering is surely part of it, but another good question to ask is: How much are they charging for it?

Jesus spent lots of time with prostitutes.

Yes, entirely as you said: fuck you.

Hahahaha, he won’t even eat vegetables. Make him carry that heavy shit around and listen to him whine.

They set people up all the time.

“Here’s some money. Buy me drugs bro. You’re under arrest!!”

“Oh, you’re pissed off at your wife? Well what are the odds? I know a hitman!”

“So you want to die huh? Why not go out as a hero? The president will be at this location and this door will be lightly guarded. Thanks for saving your country!”