If you try to heat up carbonated water it will just cause the dissolved carbon dioxide to escape and you’ll just end up with regular flat water that is hot.
Physics doesn’t let you carbonate hot water very well apparently but I’m not a physicist just applying what I remember from school. I’m not saying it’s impossible (because who knows you just might be the one to invent the method) just extremely difficult.
Why not just use your phone then. Many android phones can launch into a desktop environment
On mobile I use Firefox (I know I know just but hang on a minute) and there’s the option to turn to page reader friendly with a tap of an icon in the address bar, near the right side.
That usually gets rid of intrusive overlays, formats the text into a more readable face type and also uses dark mode.
On topic - I’m so sorry America is infested with ICE
Even in Mandarin the name（鲨鱼） is a homophone with the word for ‘kill’ 杀