Seer of the tapes! Knower of the episodes!


Are the mashed potatoes buttered, or plain?
I started using a white noise machine and fans on high when I lived down the block from a hospital emergency room. It sounded like a jet engine in my bedroom, but my brain learned to interpret the white noise as profound silence. I moved away from the hospital zone but still use the white noise to sleep.


Everyone knows that foods are extended along the axis with a circular cross section.
i.e., burgers stack higher, hot dogs grow longer.


I’m curious how it’s considered a “layoff” if it’s based on performance rather than the job itself being eliminated.
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Scotty: This is the commander of the U.S.S. Enterprise. All cities and installations on Eminiar VII have been located, identified, and fed into our fire control system. In one hour and forty-five minutes, the entire inhabited surface of your planet will be destroyed. You have that long to surrender your hostages. [dramatic music]
Bonus moment, DS9:
unnamed extra: The Federation fleet has surrounded the planet.
Random one-episode extra got the best line in the whole fricken franchise.
In Star Trek Voyager: Elite Force, there are terminals scattered around to restore your health, shield, ammo, etc. Each terminal restores one of these to a max of 100 health/shield or 300 ammo.
Then there’s the terminal just before the final boss fight that maxes everything to 999. Bricks were shat when first I saw that.
Whenever guillotines are brought up I like to point out that ~90% of the people guillotined during the French Revolution were regular commoners. And the last guy to be guillotined was the guy who had been in charge of deciding who to guillotine next.


Robot Chicken did it first: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iauuuhpSfRQ


Verily.


Girlish scream I’ll be there :D
The Voyage Home is the very first movie I can remember seeing, and it’s still my favorite Trek movie.
I once experienced an episode of sleep paralysis with auditory hallucinations. I heard a deep masculine voice speaking in a guttural language that seemed just on the edge of being comprehensible to me. As if it were the primeval language from which all others sprang. The feel of the language in my ear was as familiar as my native tongue. I recognized the cadence, I could discern where one word ended and the next began, whether a sentence was a question, and so forth. But the words themselves were somehow alien.
I strained my senses trying to hear the voice more clearly. What horrible prophesy was I being given? What dreadful task have I been appointed? Am I the keymaster? The antichrist? Am I dying? Oh shit, that’s it, isn’t it? I’m dying and going to hell. Fuckfuckfuck. Um. I accept Jesus as my savior? …Buddha? …Joe Pesci?
Then I snapped out of it and the voice turned out to be the muffled sound of my neighbor’s TV. Praise be to Joe Pesci!


Yeah, but what about all the episodes where they didn’t detect any danger? That’s like half of TOS. By TNG it’d be hubris if they still believed they could know for sure.


It makes so much more sense to send a shuttlecraft in the first place, in every case, even if the mothership isn’t going anywhere and transporters are fully operational.
Is there air? You don’t know. But you’re going to beam me down in nothing but my pajamas? Hell no. I’ll take a shuttle with its shields and weapons and life support systems.
Wouldn’t air travel account for more transcontinental passenger traffic than cars or trains?


https://www.kingdomofloathing.com/
A free text-based RPG browser game with a unique sense of absurdist humor.
The one thing that bothers me about the metric system is how much of it is never actually used. No one says “1 megameter”, for example. They say “1,000 kilometers”. When you think about it, most metric prefixes are never used with most metric units.
I once blew a coworker’s mind with Alt-Tab.