As a man with IBS I’m struggling here

Yes. In fact, it’s incredibly upsetting that you’ve brought these memories up.

And you’re telling me this isn’t an Onion article

Trick question, he’s in the Trojan Horse.

I also have a two-for-one deal.

Well, I think if I’m shaving your balls, payment should be 50% up-front and 50% upon completion. I have a no-nick guarantee.

You could pay me to do it. I’d do it for free, as well, but payment would be appreciated.

You can each have one rotisserie chicken, as a treat.

deleted by creator

Good. My wife and I both had our 13-year-old accounts permanently banned with no appeals process - all because we share an IP address and they decided without evidence that we were evading bans.

Fucking morons over there running reddit.

Infantino and FIFA couldn’t even be arsed to try and hide the corruption anymore. The Trump effect in full force.

What if we kissed near the hug murder lair

Huh I thought I’d unsubscribed from dadjokes

As long as you don’t come to Canada spewing vitriol like your president, you’ll have a good time.

Don’t you wanna know how we keep starting fires