i don't know why they call it panda express. ever see one of those lazy bastards move fast anywhere. they're slow as fuck, i'd hardly call them "express"

EstraDoll [she/her, he/him]@hexbear.net · 12 days ago

i don't know why they call it panda express. ever see one of those lazy bastards move fast anywhere. they're slow as fuck, i'd hardly call them "express"

GrouchyGrouse [he/him]@hexbear.net · edit-2 12 days ago

It’s because they are former pressers.

Sorry, allow me to elaborate. Out in the wild pandas press things. Rocks, trees, satisfied bellies, and occasionally each other (rarely in captivity.)

A panda that gets a job making Chinese food is one that’s given up on that life. They’ve moved on. They don’t press anymore.

Enjoyer_of_Games [comrade/them, he/him]@hexbear.net · 12 days ago

bit idea: Panda that talks like Rosalind Russel

HiImThomasPynchon [des/pair, it/its]@hexbear.net · 12 days ago

You call this a low-effort shitpost? This is AA-league at worst!

buckykat [none/use name]@hexbear.net · 12 days ago

I have seen them accelerate at 9.8m/s^2

(they’re pretty clumsy)

deroyonz@lemmy.zip · edit-2 12 days ago

panda express? yea please express how sorry you are for somehow delivering my stuff a whole week late