I want incredibly mundane insults like “you look like you have a terrible handshake.”

  • TheMadCodger@piefed.social
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    1 hour ago

    A few I’ve acquired over the years.

    • “At this point, you can only impress me.”
    • “My opinion of you can only go up from here”
    • “The bar was on the ground and you brought a shovel.”
    • Unencumbered by the thought process.
    • “You’re the reason we have warning labels.”
    • “They only got two brain cells and both of them are fighting for third place.”
    • “It’s impossible to underestimate you.”
    • “If you were half as smart as you think you are, you’d be twice as smart as you really are.”
    • “If you ever had a clever thought, it died alone and afraid.”
    • “They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge.”
    • “He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.” - Abraham Lincoln
    • “May I ask what’s on your mind, if you’ll forgive the overstatement?”
    • “You could hide your own Easter eggs.”
    • “I can explain it again, if you’d like, but I can’t understand for you.”
    • “He is a modest man with much to be modest about.”
    • “I would agree with you but then we would both be wrong”