We should start a holiday for when Romans arrived in England and taught them how to bathe and make beet sugar. We can have kids dress up as non-violent legionaries who wear traditional Roman military dress but don’t carry weapons because it was a peaceful invasion. They can make hand griffins instead of hand turkeys and eat turnip pie for desert.
I love the complaints in Old English of ‘these assholes comb their hair so clearly our women are going to fall in love with them and run away.’ Then when the Vikings get to Sicily all the Muslims are like, ‘these guys are disgusting and never wash’