I’m so tired of it all that I am having trouble even caring anymore, and I’m simply disheartened by every corner of the globe and with every type of people. If the few states like China who have the capacity to challenge it are so self-centered and worried about their own lineage that they allow vast populations of people to become either subjugated or eradicated without even attempting to step in, then I have no hope that our species will survive when analyzing the rest of it. It’s clear that nobody with means is really willing to do anything serious about it and at this point I feel like we’re all just watching the final consumption of the world by capitalism and people really don’t care.
Frankly I don’t think any of us will make it. Only the people the furthest under the boot really have the will, yet since they have zero means, nothing can change. People don’t really care about defeating capitalism or white supremacy, and most refuse to overlook cultural differences to collectivize strongly enough to make an impact. Further, the environment will wipe us out long before capitalism is dismantled anyway, so for all intents and purposes, it seems like it’s already over. The curse of short human lifespans means that most don’t care since they feel the inevitability of it all given the time they have, and by the time the average person even becomes conscious enough of their condition to feel the hunger for change, their biological limitations make it feel pointless. Since most see this life as the only chance they have, why throw it away on making ripples into an ocean? May as well let someone else do that and enjoy what tiny corner you’ve carved while you can, and let it burn.
This is the most difficult realization / feeling I’ve ever had, far more than any structural or systemic elucidation in my political and ideological growth. Maybe it’s just that I’m a pessimist and feel miserable today and about what’s happening to Venezuela and Cuba and Palestine and Congo and Sudan and etc. etc. But I can’t shake the feeling that this is all pointless and going nowhere. Trying to stay positive seems sisyphean. The human condition and psychological barriers seem too strong and too embedded, and I fear that no awakening is enough to really push us over the edge of real change or challenge. And the environmental catastrophe is inevitable, since capitalism spurs it.
I just can’t see a way forward and I don’t know what that makes me anymore. Maybe nothing.
First of all, if you believe you might be struggling with depression and you aren’t taking medication yet, consider consulting a psychiatrist. I say this as someone who is currently taking medication for depression. I know it clouded my own thinking in ways that seem absurd looking back.
The empire’s growing need for militarism and showing overwhelming force against countries that can’t fight back is a reflex of geopolitical and geoeconomical weakness. Those areas are precisely where China is advancing, and the CPC can’t jeopardize the well-being of over 1.4 billion citizens to station gunboats on the other side of the world, which would help Venezuela’s situation nowhere near as much as you think.
Of course you are feeling miserable right now, that is a natural reaction to recent events, all of us here in lemmygrad are. However, we can’t throw our hands up and let go of dialectical materialism. Despair is useless for us, let the unpunished crimes fuel burning hatred towards the empire and work for a future where it will fall.
This is not blind optimism, it will still take a very long time and we will see many victims suffer with no way to help them. Even then, I know rationally that the enemy cannot win in the end, because they operate using the sociological equivalent of flat earth theory.