As people have pointed out, I constantly crave attention and validation on a “pathological level”. People have said I’m a covert narcissist, most likely, and I constantly feel like I NEED to post to get my feelings out and have the attention on me, then I delete it when I don’t get that validation. I constantly have to explain to others why I’m right rather than take accountability because I start to spiral and hate myself if I don’t. However, someone said I don’t have it because I don’t bully others when I don’t get what I want.
I also feel like I may be too self-aware for it, though I don’t generally like or care enough to look inside myself and have to think hard about it just to reach a conclusion about who I am.
Understandable, I didn’t mean to ask for you to diagnose, I was just wondering how I find out
and i answered that. people are terrible at diagnosing themselves. even if someone gives you some criteria, it is hard to put them in the context if you don’t have the experience and comparison with others. that is the job for the professional.