i’d like to respond to this. both hope and fear are real motivators and can lead to both action and inaction, depending on what you’re talking about. examples from my own life: hope leaves [people who should really move on or re-evaluate] “stuck in the friend-zone” in relationships. i “invented” a cheap, shitty musical instrument out of (temporarily realized) fear i’d lose access to my expensive one.
i don’t feel like most emotions themselves are good or bad, it’s what you do with them.
See, I think you have that backwards. “I’m afraid” is an active, albiet negative, emotion, and drives you to find a solution, whether that’s running away or turning and facing your fear. “I hope” is entirely passive, you just want the universe to drop your desired outcome in your lap. I see hope as the killer of striving, of trying to make things better. A better positive view is to ask “what can I do to make my desired outcome more likely?” It’s not quite as pithy as “I hope…”, but it encourages action, rather tgan passivity. Obviously there are some things we don’t have any control over, and for those, all we have is hope.
But for me, I learned that to hope is to not take responsibility, and thus my inaction. So now, I have to “do” and not rely on “hope”. Because for me, there is no invisible hand to do things for me. There is only me. And if I do something, there is no need for hope.
What’s that whole thing, anxiety is fear of the future and regret is fear of the past. I think if you’re able to do your best controlling those, you’re doing well.
I disagree with maintaining the “I hope” mindset. It’s as dangerous as “I’m afraid,” if not more so.
~Admittedly, my perception is based on my personal experiences, and I must add the obligatory YMMV.~
I hope you’re wrong.
To give a real answer, “I hope” leads to action. “I’m afraid” leads to inaction. Action is required to progress. Inaction is required to regress.
i’d like to respond to this. both hope and fear are real motivators and can lead to both action and inaction, depending on what you’re talking about. examples from my own life: hope leaves [people who should really move on or re-evaluate] “stuck in the friend-zone” in relationships. i “invented” a cheap, shitty musical instrument out of (temporarily realized) fear i’d lose access to my expensive one.
i don’t feel like most emotions themselves are good or bad, it’s what you do with them.
See, I think you have that backwards. “I’m afraid” is an active, albiet negative, emotion, and drives you to find a solution, whether that’s running away or turning and facing your fear. “I hope” is entirely passive, you just want the universe to drop your desired outcome in your lap. I see hope as the killer of striving, of trying to make things better. A better positive view is to ask “what can I do to make my desired outcome more likely?” It’s not quite as pithy as “I hope…”, but it encourages action, rather tgan passivity. Obviously there are some things we don’t have any control over, and for those, all we have is hope.
I’m afraid you are wrong.
I hope I’m wrong too.
But for me, I learned that to hope is to not take responsibility, and thus my inaction. So now, I have to “do” and not rely on “hope”. Because for me, there is no invisible hand to do things for me. There is only me. And if I do something, there is no need for hope.
I hope that makes sense. 😉
What’s that whole thing, anxiety is fear of the future and regret is fear of the past. I think if you’re able to do your best controlling those, you’re doing well.
I love this sentiment. And I agree wholeheartedly.
I try to reverse those though: anxiety is the fear the past will repeat itself, and regret keeps me from making the same mistakes again.
It’s twisted, but it’s working.
I’ve never regretted anything I’ve done. I only regret the things I didn’t do, the thing I didn’t say, the feelings I didn’t express.
My mistakes were required to grow and learn. They’re part of me and don’t define me; we’re all better than our worst mistakes.