I cook at home because of restaurant prices and tip culture. Driving everywhere sucks. Everything feels miles away so good luck walking.
I cook at home because of restaurant prices and tip culture. Driving everywhere sucks. Everything feels miles away so good luck walking.
Swing and a miss. I decided to leave my home country because it’s broken, so after a decade of working and saving my own money, I did what I want to do. I went to a state school that gave me a full ride instead of a private school that I’d have to take loans out for, so I didn’t have any student loans holding me back and I could go back to school and get a masters in my new country. I actually just started teaching full time after training for the last couple of years.
I just have the empathy (and vicarious experience) to understand that not everyone is as fortunate as I am. It took a lot of hard work and diligence, but also a lot of luck. I wouldn’t assume that anyone who isn’t able to immigrate to a new country and begin teaching other new immigrants the language is lazy, likely to settle, or a failure. It’s difficult and like everything worthwhile in life, requires some luck to meet a lot of preparation at the right moment.
Yes, lots of people let life pass them by. I’m in full agreement with that, but a lot of people do not have the flexibility to do much about their situations. It’s not a lack of agency, it’s a lack of freedom and safety to make changes.
I understand your point to be this: everyone could have had a good life if they had correctly applied themselves and gone after what they wanted, so people who haven’t meaningfully changed their circumstances and are unhappy with their lives are themselves to blame. My point is this: many people could enjoy their lives more if they took control of their own choices, but not everyone can. Sometimes people just get dealt a shitty hand.
Have I misunderstood your point?
And lots of people don’t choose to do that. They choose to sit around and be miserable and blame other people for their failures and their lack of effort. Sorry, I don’t regard it as empathy to sit around feeling bad for people who messed up their own lives by making bad choices and then refusing to correct them. Everyone makes mistakes, but you can define yourself by them, or learn from them and make an effort.
I think you are missing my point entirely. I am condemning people who don’t make any effort, or who give up. I have nothing against people who say, never leave their home town because they love it. What I am attaching is people who never leave their hometown and are consumed by bitterness towards others because they are so unhappy there and then complain they ‘had no choice’. They always had a choice, they just refuse to make it because they are afraid of failure, and/or they refused to take responsibility for themselves and their bad choices.
What you seem to think is that these people had any agency. People have agency. They just refuse to acknowledge it, and their agency is to sit around being unhappy and day-dreaming rather than making changes to their lives. Nobody forced my friends from my hometown to do drugs, to get in trouble with the police, etc. But if you listen to them… it was never their fault. They HAD to do drugs, the police were MEAN to them for arresting them for drunk driving… that person they crashed into while drunk was an ASSHOLE. And if you don’t agree with them then you are a JERK. Oh and by the way can they borrow some money? They will totally pay you back! (If you ever ask for the money back you are SELFISH ASSHOLE).
Lemmy is full of losers who just think life should hand them things, and in their own heads they are successful geniuses who deserve to be billionaires… No idea why you want to have empathy for such shitty people who think that way.