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Joined 3 years ago
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Cake day: July 13th, 2023

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  • 9/11 was pretty bad.

    But seriously… I had a first date with a vegetarian and she knew of this great restaurant in a trendy part of town. I love trying new food, and was excited for this restaurant. While looking over the menu the Portabella Burger spoke to me, so I ordered it and it was incredible. We had good conversation and we were getting along fairly well. We went for a walk around the area and that’s when I discovered that my body does not handle large amounts of mushrooms very well. I immediately bloated full of gas, and I could tell it was going to be nasty. My focus immediately was 100% on holding it in… the conversation began to suffer because I couldn’t think of anything to talk about, and had a hard time focusing on what she was talking about. I just wanted the date to end. I eventually came up with what was likely a very lame excuse to end the date. I waddled back to my car and then had the longest drive home. I never heard from her after that.







  • Bob Robertson IX @discuss.tchncs.detoLemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world•...
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    28 days ago

    In every new parent class I took leaving up to the birth of my daughter, no one EVER mentioned the importance of pulling the little frills out on the legs after changing a diaper.

    I heroically volunteered to change her diaper during a hockey game, and when I got back to our seats I handed her off to my wife. About 5 minutes later my wife was covered in pee and asked why I hadn’t pulled out the frills.

    That’s a mistake you don’t make more than once… and I try to warn all new parents so they can learn from my mistake.