• explodicle@sh.itjust.works
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    9 hours ago

    We had one where we had to share a fun fact about our names. I opened with “actually I’ve got a fake name” and freaked out my boss, it was fun. My ancestor made up a fake name while emigrating over a century ago.

  • Macaroni_ninja@lemmy.world
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    9 hours ago

    Fucking nightmare.

    On my last corpo job onboarding there were about 50 new starters and the HR lady pulled out a microphone and asked everyone to share something interesting about themselves as an ice breaker.

    You could hear the cringe in the air. I just said that I like coffee.

  • You know what’s fuckin’ wild? I’ve literally only ever had to do these dumbass “team-building exercises” that treat you like a toddler in kindergarten at jobs where you never actually work as a god damn team. Meanwhile, every job that required working with others in some meaningful way just threw you into the grinder and let you figure it out.

    • sem@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      20 hours ago

      How can you tell? Is it the balloon?

      I never notice these things… Is there a game on the internet where you have to detect ai images

      • CalypsoGirl@lemmy.today
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        3 hours ago

        Yes the balloon is phasing into the chair and also zoom in at the picture of the people giving each other high fives. The guy on the far right, arms don’t work like that.

      • DaPorkchop_ [any]@lemmy.ml
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        13 hours ago

        partially the balloon, but also the “mandatory fun” poster is way too on-the-nose - nobody working in HR is self-aware enough to do that

          • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            10 hours ago

            I don’t even know if I could put it into words… It’s too bold and clear compared to the rest of the stuff in the scene.

            I also think there’s something about the angle the supposed photo was taken from that would make the text look subtly distorted in some way, and it’s not.

  • DonJefe@lemmy.world
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    17 hours ago

    A fun fact about myself is that I hate being forced to tell other people fun facts about myself

  • pageflight@piefed.social
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    1 day ago

    Scary, but not quite as bad as: Meeting invite: no title, later this morning, attendees are your manager and HR. (That is, layoffs.)

    • driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br
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      1 day ago

      My wife was laid off at the begging of the month and it went something like this. The HR girl went to her table and asked her and other coworker to come with her to a meeting room. In the meeting room was other HR person who asked the three of them to sit and told them that they were laid off, including the HR lady that came for my wife.

    • TipRing@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      I have also had this one be 1. Someone has died in the office. 2. You senior manager / director was fired for corruption and HR wants to question everyone for involvement.

    • drcobaltjedi@programming.dev
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      1 day ago

      When I was fired my boss just told me to come with him for a minute. Knew right then I was being fired. He lead me down to the conference room and HR is sitting there only cementing my thought.

  • GreenKnight23@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    tell us a fun fact about yourself

    I love these questions because I use it as an excuse to “trauma dump” things to the group and act like it’s the most normal thing ever.

    of course none of it was true, but man…did I sell it enough that they never asked the groups I was in those kinds of questions again.

    example

    I found out when I was 7 that I was able to dislocate my shoulder when my father yanked on my arm hard enough when he caught me sneaking food. it was cool while I was in school because I could get out of gym and not have to explain all the bruising on my back in the locker room. I can’t do it anymore as it’s just too painful to pop it back into place. 😁

    everyone else 😶😬😐😟

    • Agent641@lemmy.world
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      16 hours ago

      “I learned how to lay bricks when I was 10 because when mum hung herself dad made us brick up the closet where she did it so we would never be able to go in there where the demon who made her do it would do it to us too. My favorite part was mixing the cement with the trowel, it’s so satisfying.”

    • MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      “Hey did I tell you guys about that time I got arrested?”

      “That wasn’t on your background check? 😬!”

      “I got it expunged 😉”

    • Sergio@piefed.social
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      18 hours ago

      Nah. It’s Two Truths and a Lie. So I’d be like:

      • “Every Monday I come to work I want to kill myself.”
      • “Every Tuesday I come to work I want to kill myself.”
      • “Every Wednesday I come to work I want to kill myself.”