When “doing it”, are you regularly thinking about putting clothes away, which clothes to wash next or if you emptied the washing machine? Or when you washed your clothes the last time?
Is it distracting to the point you get soft (for penis havers) or dry (for ADHDers with vaginas)?
I have to actively keep myself focussed on sex by fantasizing some scene or story to myself. Just actually having sex isn’t enough, not because I’m not into it or not enjoying it. It’s just that if I don’t fill my mind with something sexy it’s going to get full with chores, or dinner options, or the way the bed squeaks… And then I’m completely out the moment.