You can be bitchy at a third party together. Make it a bonding experience.
What is parallel play?
We hang out together, you play your game and I play mine.
Damn, I didn’t know this had a name! My wife and I do this all the time. Our computers are right next to each other’s, and we play our own games for hours at a time. It’s glorious.
Yeah, I think it’s something people have been doing for eons and that only recently has a name. It’s really no different than when my wife and I would read separate things next to each other.
Wait this is a ADHD thing? Ive always wanted to do this witg friends.
Indeed it is! It also comes up under autism too… the way these two diagnoses intersect is evolving in real time.
It also applies to chores and overcoming the dreaded “wall of awful”. It’s called “parallel work” or “body doubling.”
Makes me think either everyone has ADHD/autism, or every single person I know and myself has it 😅😅 this just seems like a “regular people” thing.
For me, being around “normal” people is just not that comfortable so naturally all my friends tend to be some kind of neurodivergent
Another meme here said it best: “Yes, urinating is something we all do but if you’re doing it 60 times a day, you may have a problem.”
For sure
For all of my life most of my closer circle has been neurodiverse because we tend to get along via tolerating or even enjoying each other’s particularities. For instance, enjoying frequent infodumps rather than being annoyed.
I read that as “two diagnosed insects” and now I’m disappointed.
It’s funny because while my boyfriend and I aren’t into gaming and neither of us are diagnosed officially, we have always enjoyed this phenomena of doing our own thing while being close to one another. When we were younger, our friends thought we were weird for being this way, but they didn’t mind it. They just didn’t get it because they liked doing activities with their partners. We do that too, a little bit, but we mostly prefer to be on our own in each other’s presence.
I don’t think he has anything, but we are both sure I have ADHD. He grew up in an ADHD family and while he has some of the traits - mainly all the fun ones - he’s lucky to have avoided all the negative traits of ADHD. I’m not as lucky, to say the least, but also not unfortunate enough that I can’t function. It’s like a grey zone. We manage, but we are a bit odd compared to the norm.
Wait what’s support swapping?
When two people share tasks. Basically if one person has a problem doing some chore or something and so the other does it for them in exchange for swapping with another chore or task. https://actuallyautistic.wiki/wiki/Autistic_love_languages#Support_swapping
This is literally how my partner and I divided our household tasks LMAO
I do the stuff she hates doing because it’s Meh to me, she does the stuff that I hate doing for the same reason. Like she’s fine doing dishes, but HATES putting them away, I’m the exact opposite. I’ll put them away all day, I absolutely HATE doing them. Every now and then we both end up feeling super guilty over it because we’re both thinking like “Man, I get a WAY better deal out of this. I’m so taking advantage of them…”
But we basically reason that as long as we both feel like we’re getting a better deal than the other one and we’re talking things out with each other it can’t be too unfair in reality.
That’s the 60/40 rule in action. If you feel like you’re doing 60+% of the work in a relationship it’s probably roughly 50/50 (as long as they roughly feel the same)
We don’t always notice all the way that people do things for us, and us to them.
Damn, here I was thinking it’s when someone switches to playing Mercy
Ze healing is not as rewarding as ze hurting!
There’s a joke in there about Symmetra switching from Support to DPS, but I’m le tired and only got this far
but I’m le tired
Then take a nap… THEN MAKE ZE JOKE!
‘Please crush my soul back into my body’ what does this mean?
Also yeah cool leafs are great
My wife likes it if I literally just lay on top of her with all my bodyweight, I presume that
That sounds so nice, I should ask my wife to do that
I enjoy it from time to time, my wife absolutely loves it :-)
Aah right
I have a weighted blanket. It’s pretty good.
I used to have one of those!! Might get one again at some point because it’s so calming.
Also, I know this is a weird add on, so I apologize, but I was in an MRI scanner yesterday and it is by far one of the most calming things I’ve ever tried. Like a spa day at a rave party. The magnetism is so intense, btw, that it actually kinda feels like a massage or a weighted blanket that moves. I was terribly close to dosing off in there. 10/10. Granted, I can’t really recommend it since you’ll only end up in one of those if something is wrong with you, so I hope you never get to go into one. But if you do, take it from me that it pretty awesome.
I’ve been in those loads. Never felt anything! :(
Really? You didn’t feel the push of the magnets? Weird. Or maybe I’m the weird one haha.
I hope that whatever you were in it for has been sorted and that you’re okay today, my friend 🤗
Nah, I’ve never had a sense for electromagnetism. It was fixed, thanks, at least for some number of years.
Yeah, I imagine that satisfies the same core need.
Like while I’m working away from home, and since my ex moved away, I’ve taken to having a big pillow next to me while I sleep :-/
🥴
I wish I could forget to eat again. The three meals a day conditioning is really hard to break.
My problem is I forget how many I’ve already eaten and end up with four or five.
The last 3 meals all happen after 8pm when the stims wear off.
Most recently, I’ve been the opposite of that and lost nearly half my body weight in ~6mo of chronic disregulation. No, it’s not fun, either. 😅
Just remembering if I’ve eaten isn’t enough, I’ve gotta assume the abdominal discomfort isn’t anxiety, but legit hunger —that’s a tough one to ascertain, atm.
Whoa. I got the other neruodivergent thing where recalling to eat on time is a battle. I had no idea that swung the other way for some folks.
I only have like 3 routines but they are so ingrained that they stand out against the rest of my ADHD inconsistency.
My keys ALWAYS go on the hook by the door. Haven’t lost them in years.
My wallet ALWAYS goes on my nightstand when I get home. Haven’t lost it in years.
I FEEL the need to eat at breakfast, lunch, and dinner because of pressure from family members. I also have the urge to clear my plate every time. These two are so ingrained that my internal clock goes off even if I’m avoiding a real clock. It’s like an addiction. This is currently the hardest thing for me to break and I hate it.
I’m currently losing too much weight due to this and I’m trying to eat more meals, but yeah I’m worried I’ll end up like everyone else struggling to eat less eventually :( feels like we can’t win sometimes
Yeah, both increasing and decreasing are difficult when trying to change what few habits we have developed.
Ah yes, the shaky body alarm clock.
