Every goddamn tutorial video… Congrats. You’ve just pissed me off with you droning on and on.
“Hey guys, welcome back to Dipshit McGillicuddy’s. Today we’re going to be, uh, doing this simple, uh, tutorial. All you gotta do is use these links <shows notepad on screen> and follow, us, these instructions. Sometimes I get confused on this and not sure what to d— <skips 3 minutes in> And thats when my father decided to tell me that he once grabbed JD Salinger’s a— <6 more minutes in> I think it went wrong when I snitched on Big— <Skip another 2 minutes in> And thats how you do it.”
Also political speeches should be mostly outlawed.
All they do is lie anyways, make grandiose “promises,” and just denigrate people in general. I’d say, “i want the Cliff Notes version,” but I have to believe, “it too is pumped full of ‘resume lies.’”
Yeah, tutorial videos can be great for mechanical, physical stuff.
Learning how to replace the serpentine belt in my car was much easier to just watch a guy do it, rather than read the documentation, and having to constantly go back and look up the name of this or that part to create a visual.
But anything software related? I’m crawling up the fucking wall waiting for the person in the video to finally get to the next terminal command, and stop talking about something that doesn’t apply to my situation.
Or they shovel it as an ad for Amazon groceries. Recipe books were simple once, just a list of ingredients, their measurements, and the instructions to complete the recipe.
For transcripts of YouTube videos (where available): If on mobile browser, switch to desktop mode. Press “show more” under description, then “more” under the longer description, then scroll down to transcript and press “show transcript”, then scroll again for the actual transcript. (It’s on display in the bottom drawer of a locked filling cabinet stored in a disused lavatory with a sign on the door saying ‘Beware of the Leopard’.)
By just not having a profit motive? It’s telling that the best tutorial videos these days are short form from people just trying to help other people to learn the thing they just stumbled their way through because nobody else had made that digestible tutorial yet. A sincere “thank you” from a stranger feels amazing, and I don’t think it needs to be somebody’s actual job to explain how to change the filter in my specific model of fridge.
And then you find one that’s halfway decent and bearable, except the video is 5 years old and step one references a menu that no longer exists. I installed Ardour over a year ago, I have yet to create any music with it. I’ll give you one guess why.
I made a whole website for my squadron in Elite:Dangerous for this exact reason. I hated having to send people to shitty YouTube tutorials to learn, so I just wrote my own guides from scratch.
Every goddamn tutorial video… Congrats. You’ve just pissed me off with you droning on and on.
“Hey guys, welcome back to Dipshit McGillicuddy’s. Today we’re going to be, uh, doing this simple, uh, tutorial. All you gotta do is use these links <shows notepad on screen> and follow, us, these instructions. Sometimes I get confused on this and not sure what to d— <skips 3 minutes in> And thats when my father decided to tell me that he once grabbed JD Salinger’s a— <6 more minutes in> I think it went wrong when I snitched on Big— <Skip another 2 minutes in> And thats how you do it.”
I will sacrifice your first born.
Fuck video tutorials.
Write it down you lazy fucks.
Edit: There are things for which video is good - stuff that really requires the visual. Which is about 10% of stuff.
I have found my people 👆
Dozens of us!
Also, I feel this way about news stories just as strongly
Haven’t watched news in decades, print or death. Also political speeches should be mostly outlawed.
All they do is lie anyways, make grandiose “promises,” and just denigrate people in general. I’d say, “i want the Cliff Notes version,” but I have to believe, “it too is pumped full of ‘resume lies.’”
Yeah, tutorial videos can be great for mechanical, physical stuff.
Learning how to replace the serpentine belt in my car was much easier to just watch a guy do it, rather than read the documentation, and having to constantly go back and look up the name of this or that part to create a visual.
But anything software related? I’m crawling up the fucking wall waiting for the person in the video to finally get to the next terminal command, and stop talking about something that doesn’t apply to my situation.
I miss the days when everything was either an instructable or a video game guide
I just want to Ctrl+f some keywords in the text to find what I need, not listen to ten years of rambling back story
I hate online recipes for this reason.
They’re all prefaced with some bullshit
“Hmmm. Some chocolate chip cookies sound good.”
Searches for recipe…
🎄Every year at Christmas, my Grandma would make her famous... 🎄Scrolls down…
🎄...and that's how Grandma got run over by a reindeer.🎄“Ooh. I wonder who wrote that song?”
Spends rest of afternoon on Wikipedia. Does not make chocolate chip cookies.
Or they shovel it as an ad for Amazon groceries. Recipe books were simple once, just a list of ingredients, their measurements, and the instructions to complete the recipe.
Tutorials are videos because Youtube makes people a lot more money than a text website.
Online recipes have an entire fucking story glued on because without the story, the instructions aren’t copyrightable.
It’s profit motive all the way down.
Because we’re all swimming in debt and cash strapped. Now, dance monkey, dance.
Ctrl+F for cooking terms like cups or tbsp. Though the real problem nowadays with recipes is that they’re all AI slop
For transcripts of YouTube videos (where available): If on mobile browser, switch to desktop mode. Press “show more” under description, then “more” under the longer description, then scroll down to transcript and press “show transcript”, then scroll again for the actual transcript. (It’s on display in the bottom drawer of a locked filling cabinet stored in a disused lavatory with a sign on the door saying ‘Beware of the Leopard’.)
And yeah, ugh!
But if they don’t give you all the back story how would they segue into telling you how it relates to the wonderful sponsor to their video today?
By just not having a profit motive? It’s telling that the best tutorial videos these days are short form from people just trying to help other people to learn the thing they just stumbled their way through because nobody else had made that digestible tutorial yet. A sincere “thank you” from a stranger feels amazing, and I don’t think it needs to be somebody’s actual job to explain how to change the filter in my specific model of fridge.
And then you find one that’s halfway decent and bearable, except the video is 5 years old and step one references a menu that no longer exists. I installed Ardour over a year ago, I have yet to create any music with it. I’ll give you one guess why.
I made a whole website for my squadron in Elite:Dangerous for this exact reason. I hated having to send people to shitty YouTube tutorials to learn, so I just wrote my own guides from scratch.