As an early 90’s millennial, I’ve never noticed a “gen z stare” as described in news articles like a “blank face that shows lack of social skill or ability to think”. The only times I’ve witnessed it happen and seen the older person accuse them of “gen z stare” is when the older person says something off hand or dumb but isn’t self aware enough to realize they’re being weird. Hell, I’ve given people a blank face countless times because I was taught it was better to say nothing at all sometimes. Especially when it came to talking to older people at work.
I remember when I was 16, some middle aged guy at work accused me of having no personality. In reality, I kept all conversations short as possible with him (like almost everyone in the store) because they were casually racist and misogynistic.
Im sorry but thats just not normal unless you are neurodivergent. We’re not robots. Honestly something is wrong if you dont even have mirror facial expressions.
I get dissasociating from a rude customer, but i ja e gotten that stare from a simple ass “hey hows it goin”.
Hey how’s it going is just an empty phrase that means Hi, you should not expect any response to that other than a hi back at most, unless you actually want to know how they are doing, and the answer to that is they are tired and miserable, which you would know if you ever worked a customer facing minimum wage retail job before. Just because people don’t have the energy for your bullshit doesn’t mean they are neurodivergent. In many other countries where employees aren’t forced to plaster a smile on their face the interaction won’t be anymore then this either.
Uh, actually, it kinda does mean that, because the vast majority of people aren’t so exhausted by responding to “Hey, hows it going?” with a normal, human response that they not only completely opt out of doing it but then go on the internet and complain about how unfair it is that they’re expected to behave in line with what is defined as ‘the norm’.
Here’s the questions you need to ask yourself: Why do I feel like being asked to engage with a person that is asking a normal question is equivalent to being forced to engage with someone that is treating me poorly? Why am I seemingly unable to separate the two, and conflate participating in social niceties with being abused? Why is the social equivalent of a papercut and a shotgun blast to the face the same in my eyes, and why do both generate a similar response?
But whatever you do, if you can’t handle being expected to respond to “hey hows it going?” with some variation of “not bad, you?”, for the love of Christ, please don’t willingly seek out employment where a key facet of the job is doing just that, or at the very least if you do, save the blinking and acting like Im inconveniencing you for asking a normal-ass question like “Is this the line to pay?” If you can’t even handle that, that is not at all the fault of the person on the other side of the dialog.
Not everyone has the opportunity to get something that isnt customer facing. Most jobs created today are low wage service positions. People are tired and jaded at a world thats leaving them with a fucked up environment, no social safety nets, dwindling job prospects, increasing costs to live without rising wages, rising authoritarian governments all over the world. I get that those positions should have a bit more tact but I also empathize with those young employees who feel like the world has turned its back on them and so they are just doing the bare minimum to survive. The world is becoming less caring for its inhabitants are you really surprised those growing up in that environment are mirroring the treatment they get from the world back to you?
Yes, exactly. Everyone knows it’s a pointless platitude, the goal is to get an acknowledgement in response that you can further the interaction. When you don’t get that response it’s a problem - you don’t know if they’re busy, and the vast majority of people don’t want to be rude by just launching into your order (or whatever) just expecting them to be ready for it.
wait I thought they were just “staring into space” so how are we assuming they’re busy now?
I assume they’re busy - what you assume is your business, but “they’re busy” seems the nicest option.
Genuinely what is the proper response to ‘hey, how’s it going?’ Because that is not normal where I grew up but it’s normal where I live now and I always respond with something like “good, you?” Unless I know the person, which is obviously wrong because half the time I get no response lol HELP
“Good you” is the perfect response, its just a more personal version of Hi or Hello, no need to over think it. As for the second part if you know the person hows it going can just be a conversation starter, its meant to ask what are you up to, i.e. is there a light topic we can have small talk about that isnt going to be too involved. You can respond with something along the lines of “I’m doing good, such and such happened the other day that was nice, how about you.”
Yeah this is something I needed to adapt to as well. That phrase is not a question it’s just another way of saying sup or hi, you don’t need to answer it even with a cursory I’m good how are you, I just say hey or hi and move on to the next part of the conversation.