My elementary school teacher told us once that Americans only poop once a week. The climate is colder in North America, so their intestines pack the poop together very densely such that they only need to poop once a week. She said you’d be sent to the doctor if you poop daily in America.
Is this true?
Is this why so many Europeans treat us like some different species
What the fuck am I reading
Lol
Bait
Nope. I shit every day, in the morning, on a schedule.
Your teacher was full of shit. Sure the Standard American Diet (SAD) is terrible and leaves fiber much to be desired, but not every American sticks to the SAD. I’m sure other countries have people that have shit diets and get constipated too, not just the US.
Generalizations don’t help anyone.
I used to shit like every two to three days, especially if I were out backpacking. Now it’s more like daily.
I used to shit more like twice a day during grad school (probably because of all the junkfood like living off microwave burritos lol) but then I shifted to about once a day and was mildly concerned about it.
When I looked it up to see if it were symptomatic of low fiber or something else… color me surprised to find dozens of reddit posts talking about how people only shit once every 3-4 days. I was stunned.
Then I realized a lot of those posts were made by Americans, and it reminded me of someone in college who once reasoned that him living off McDonald’s for three meals a day was “sustainable” because he counted calories religiously… not taking into account that he was essentially living off fiberless food whatsoever lmao
So basically…
No.
In nursing school they taught us anything from 2x daily to 1x weekly is normal due mostly to variations in diet but with some influence from activity level, hydration, and genetics. Now I’m in practice that seems too long; I start getting nervous when my patients say it’s been 3-4 days. Personally I poop between 4x daily and once every 3 days depending on how angry my IBS is. I do HAVE to know what part of the world you’re in now though.
FWIW between once every three days up to three times a day is considered medically normal. If you’re consistently outside of this without obvious reason you should look into your digestive health.
When I was younger I typically only shat about once a week, naturally (as in, without medical/medicine causes)
Every shit was a lincoln worthy log that i could have probably built a cabin with.
I miss those days.
I hate shitting 2-3 times a day now.
Do it on company time, and I will be calling it filling out paperwork.
until the company installs those insane slanted toilets that make it impossible to shit.
Then you use your bosses desk. Bonus points if you stick an ice cream cone in it.
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All this (wonderful) shit-talking and no-one has mentioned painkillers. Earlier this year I spent a couple of weeks in hospital along with a lot of other oldies with fall injuries. We were all taking oxycodone and paracetamol for the pain, and the nurses were obsessed with our bowel movements. We were given laxatives twice a day to hurry things along, and threatened with an enema if we went too long without pooing. After the laxatives worked their magic on me I started refusing to take them, because it took me so long to get across the ward to the toilet I was scared I’d shit myself halfway.
So yes, painkillers are costive.
I had to take oxy’s after hand surgery, and I am not accustomed to painkillers. I ended up constipated, and it was (BY FAR) the worst poop of my life. Like, that (literal) shit hurt worse than the pain of surgery
I’m talking 45+ mins on the toilet; pushing, sweating, almost crying, standing up and down trying to get things to move. I became a little fearful and wondered if I was about to tear my rectum. I felt like I wanted to faint. I couldn’t just stop because it was half-way out, making my bum feel like I was getting spread-open by a dragon or something… and it wouldn’t pinch off. I admittedly dug in my butt, trying to pull it out… I was in fucking shambles and beginning to panic. It felt like I was fighting for my life
It finally cleared, and I was left with pure exhaustion and butt pain. Prune juice helped me to reconcile that issue, and even though I had never tried prune juice — I’m a “forever fan” of that sweet sweet elixir of preemptive relief
I’ll never forget that poop
Cleaning you is waaay easier than disimpaction. If it’s bad enough I have to call someone who doesn’t work holidays, weekends, or any other hour a bank isn’t open. If it’s NOT bad enough to call that person, that’s actually way worse because it’s gonna be you, me, and these phalanges, and neither of us is gonna be having a good time. Now that I work in a tiny community hospital I don’t even have residents I can sucker into it anymore!
“Shhh shhhh shhhhh… you’ll feel better soon, I promise”. And they do! (Then my shift ends, and I think about my life choices)
I was never taught disimpaction in school… but when you know it’s gotta happen, it just is what it is
You’re mixing up Americans with sloths, but I guess we’re not that different
American here. I poop every day, some times 2x a day.
Damn, really living it up.
What tf even is that?!!
What are you trying to say?
It’s talking about absurd things people will say about other countries. The statement the teacher made was absurd, with zero grounds for evidence.
When I grew up in North Korea I ate rats to survive, but eating is illegal so the police came. But the police also tries to survive so they take the rats. I thought this was normal until I read your posts. Now I know that true freedom is the class inequality of pooping once a week.
