For starters, find a way to discipline yourself into using social media less.

Lots of people feel shitty and stressed because they’re using algorithms designed to make them feel shitty and stressed.

Move your attention from your thoughts about what you could be doing, to your breath and your body.

I find my feet can be quite grounding, as our feet have a lot of nerve endings in them, they’re pretty sensitive like the hands. And usually our thoughts you know, we experience those in our head, because we associate it with our hearing.

By moving my attention down to a different part of my body, it helps to make the thoughts feel less intrusive. You don’t have to push the thinking away or get rid of it, just put most of your attention someplace else.

A lot of mindfulness meditation is this practice. And body scans and walking meditation are a couple of nice alternatives to sitting that can work well even when restless.

Any attempt at self-improvement is not pathetic. My phone suggested self-forgiveness, which also is key here.

You are trying to be more aware and less impulsive. The key here is mindfulness, not that it’s easy to attain/achieve.

I said self-forgiveness because beating yourself up for your perceived failures will also hold you back.

Failure is key to success.

I’ve made a little progress toward changing my internal monolog, and it has served me well. Be nicer to yourself and laugh off your failures lest the memory of them become baggage.

My dad is a Buddhist. I never got good at meditation, but I recognize its value.

But mainly, be kinder to yourself. Perfection was never an option, so why would you expect it from yourself?

Relax. Breathe. You’ll figure things out, whether or not you achieve these goals.

So I struggle with something similar and it turns out it’s because I’m autistic. Maybe you are neurodivergent too? If you decide to consider this idea, I recommend to check out content where neurodivergent people talk about their condition. I would never consider I might be autistic just using descriptions by neurotypicals, the difference is huge.

Now, about your actual question… I don’t really have a perfect solution. I personally use marijuana. I usually plan the time to take a break from all the projects and learning at the end of the day. I make sure all the important chores are already taken care of. Weed definitely does help but I see how it’s far from a perfect solution. Ideally, you wouldn’t rely on any external substance for your wellbeing.

Many people recommend meditation as a way to regain control of racing thoughts. I was never able to make that work though. Whenever I try I just start working on one of my projects in my head…

Good luck!

You are not alone, soooo many people, myself included, are like this. As are many with ADHD.

For me, I found listing out the things I want to do for each project (the details, not the name of the project), and putting them all low priority works. Then I move a few to high priority and tell myself those are my “tasks” for the week.

That stops me from going down the rabbit hole pretty well, while still enjoying my time. I find the number of tasks fluctuates, mainly because after a while of shifting between TV, games, and reading in the gaps, I get that feeling of wanting more productivity being fun back. Which sounds like the feeling you want.

It’s not stupid,

If you can afford get a therapist, helped me more than any suggestion I’ve seen on this post.

May also work for you

I had similar problems and couldn’t figure out how to get out of that cycle before it ended up with me having panic attacks, and anxiety/depression bad enough to be put on SSRIs. If you can’t relax and feel tense all the time, that is a serious issue! Nip it in the bud if you can.

What I eventually figured out is that I needed separation between my work and my personal time – and yes, those kinds of personal projects are still work even if you’re just doing them for yourself.

Decide how long you want to dedicate to working – then hold yourself to that. Like, actually write down the start and end times you worked so that you can prove to yourself that you really put in the effort. I use plain text files on my computer for this; do what works for you. After you’ve put in the time you committed to, you are OFF THE CLOCK. Stop working – even if you have to force yourself – and go do something else. Without guilt.

Cannabis? 🤷🏻‍♂️

You’ve already had several good suggestions here.

I learned that when rest no longer leads to recovery, that is burnout and maybe even depression. Pay attention to this feeling and take it seriously. Good luck.

If you’re thinking about what you could be doing, you might have some unhelpful conditioning related to “being productive” and other such myths of how to live “correctly”. You might be able to think your way out of that way of being and you might need to talk to someone to do this, such as a therapist.

If you’re worried about forgetting something that you need to do later or about some deadline sneaking up on you, then writing things down and setting reminders could help. I did a lot of this and it trained me to literally forget things that I didn’t yet need to start working on without risking missing deadlines. I found it very freeing. Something like that might help you.

I hope you find some peace from something in these replies.

I’ve found the best way to achieve both the mental break, and the relaxation, are hobbies that that are physically and mentally taxing.

In the summer, its skateboarding and motorcycles, in the winter its snowboarding.

Wears you out enough to get proper sleep, and they require all your mental focus not to get hurt.

What does relaxing look like to you?

Having a couple of things I like to do helps me such as listening to music, reading, watching movies, gaming etc. Having the discipline to cut off took a while to master as well. Over the weekends, I tell my team members not to send emails or text messages unless its super urgent. I give myself targets, for example watching a couple of movies or TV shows over the weekend and deal with the shit come Monday.

I was supposed to have a great time but instead I burned myself out

That’s when you need to take a step back, do something else. When I’m gaming I do burn myself out, so now I’m taking a break from WoW and started on movies / tv shows again.

I hope this doesn’t come across as pathetic…

not at all. I’ve been there. what did you do for art? i mean i’m a musician, but every once in a while i try to learn a different instrument or pick up a paintbrush. then i can go back to one of my main instruments and not only does it feel better, i can play it better for some reason.

i used to be an economist and one of the things that came through the department during my tenure was that people crave novelty. if you try learning some new skill or talent, maybe it will scratch the itch for a bit. my latest has been cooking greek food.

Why did you start working on these other projects? For fun? To learn? Are they still fulfilling that purpose if you’re burnt out? If not, what are you losing out on by not working on them? If it was for fun, then that’s over for now, go do something else for fun.

Consume less caffeine and sugar.